knock, knock.

well, i heard the click. after struggling with the same door jam for so long, the sound of a twisting lock is so reassuring. im onto my next task now.

what did i learn from this? good question. because besides the continuous reminder of wasted time, nothing has shown as a 'break through' of any sort. i guess i'll keep swinging, missing, and stepping up again. i've found that im a lot better at striking out than doing much else. i can't complain though. things have been fun, and im starting to perfect my swing. that way, when the time comes..i'll get a good whack at whatever it is im hitting.
i have a hard time listening, i can say for sure this is one thing i have learned about myself. i don't like believing anything unless i see light at the end of the tunnel, a turning point, or grass thats a tad bit greener. i always hear what you say, disregard the things i don't like thinking true, crash, and then wind up slowly retracing my steps to the exact time the words came off your lips. im a mess. and im glad that you've been here to remind me that being this way is exceptable, and part of the reason you love me. i guess when someone is made up of qualities that don't quite fit the bill, that's just what happens. you fall for everything that is so un-perfect about them.

it's funny to me how shook up i thought i would be about all of this. closing, locking up, and moving on is a scary thought. i know that im confident with where i stand. im confident with who i have. and im more than confident about every mistake leading up to this. please don't think your actions have caused anything more than hurtles for me to jump. with every situation i've faced, i've been knocked down only to pull myself back up. this time will be no different, i may have an unpredictable success rate, but im a pretty strong girl.